Atalist's Dungeon

I look at a picture of us. I smile in every photo. feeling nostalgic and yet wondering where the time went. wondering what made us change so quickly we have moved past what we were before, to something different now. I am reminded of what was said during our vows. to the point where we have foresaken our beloved. where it is so comfortable we fail to see eachother. my eyes are open and I see you. but do you see me? do you still know me? questions need answering.

There is possibility I feel it in my bones, I feel it inside of me. a flutter of expectation and a gaggle of emotion. I am ready and my body is willing. so many things to be excited and terrified for. a little life that is my responsibility. I care. 

you are a martyr. you want me to be happy All of these things I get, and yet you cannot see the things I do are for the best of many. I fight tooth and nail to see my path and yet all I see is the shrouded grass in front of me. nothing more, nothing less. A fog. There is nothing more to say except I am walking my path. you want to cut off your nose despite your face and you don't understand. If you walk away that is you doing so, if you harm yourself that is you doing so, just call a spade a spade and say it's because you can't watch anymore. the seven deadly sins and you pick envy.

I need you out of my head, out of my thoughts, out of mind. you invade my memories at the most inopportune times. and yet, I cannot escape you. I am not sure I want to.