Looking on,

Its a beautiful day outside,
and I am looking for the clouds.
The sun is shining,
and I am waiting for the rain.
It's not going to rain, or be cloudy.
I know this yet, I can't help but wait for it.
My entire life has been waiting for a storm to happen.
Usually they come.
I look to my feet in the grass,
feel the ants crawling over my feet.
Business stops for no one.
Life carries on.
Yet I cannot help but stand here and doubt.
There must be something perpetually wrong with me.
Am i that jaded?
The sun is shining and I can feel it on my skin.
I wait for the red and the hurt,
but it doesn't come.
Not yet.
So much waiting for things to happen.
I decide to move, i lift my feet and run...
not exactly sure where I am running to at this point.
I hurdle the fence blocking me in.
I keep running,
I run to the lake... keep running until it touches my harden feet.
The cool releases my thoughts.
I can think now,
I don't have to wait.
Thinking and feeling without consequence.
I look up and see the blue sky.
It is a beautiful day.

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