okay has lost all meaning (March 22)

I am tired of dealing with "okay"
I am tired of the connotation of "okay" 
I am losing all patience with the word "okay" 
that is because nothing feels okay right now. 
I feel like I am perpetually being treated poorly by those that should be supporting us. 
I will not be naming names, but if you think it is about you, it probably is. 
All I have been doing is trying to follow the path that mom gave me and that dad, my sister, and I are walking down. 
This is a situation where too many people have too many fucking opinions that they should keep to themselves and stop talking shit about us. 
My parents are private. They always have been. So it would track that all of the decisions they have made thus far have been given to my sister and me. 
My mother in August told me what she wanted for her end-of-life care and celebration of life and that is what we are going with. This was also confirmed the week before her birthday party. 
We are doing what my father thinks is necessary and will continue to do so. 
If the shit-talking continues and there is a fight about what should be done with the celebration of life, I am going to say it straight up... you don't need to be a part of it. This is for our family to celebrate my mother and to hear from people that there is already bitching about what my mother wanted us to do ... those people can shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down because I don't see any of them stepping up to be here to lift her, to turn her every couple of hours, to give injections and to feed her. 
None of this is okay. We are in the middle of a fucking crisis and all I can hear is how I am a control freak, or that they don't like the way I have been dealing with things... and yet to my face, all I hear is that I am doing this amazing job. 
My sister is in the same boat. We keep repeating to those that ask us, not a single one of these people complaining has checked in with how we are holding up, how we are managing... checking in on our mental health about the fact we are about to lose our mom and very young age. None of these people complaining seem to give a shit about the fact that we are trying to give mom the absolute best care and to be there for her. No one gives a fuck that I have given up precious time with my kids and that I feel like I have a need to be in two places at once. No one seems to give a shit that Carly has given up her life in Toronto to move back here to care for mom and that we are managing all of the things. Most importantly we are here for our father who is worried that all of these judgy fucking people are going to think that he has given up on our mother if he puts her in hospice... to the point of his own fucking detriment. We are not looking for a gold star, we are looking for compassion in this delicate time and apparently, that is not going to happen

Okay has lost all meaning to us. The high praise that we get from these people is utter fucking bullshit because we know and we hear all of the shit-talking and all of the hyper-critical comments that come back. 

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